the absence of her laughter...

years ago, in photography class I dedicated a photograph to my sister -- and entitled it "the absence of her laughter"... there were four sisters... then there were three... her name was Myra... and today is her birthday...

I didn't want to be down or sad today... I simply wanted to remember my sister... her smile... her eyes... her hair... her laughter... her voice... her love... and yet, the human part of me caved in... and I can't seem to stop the tears... it's just very hard to remember all the happy memories without missing her... without wanting her here...

I think when you lose someone... a sister... a soulmate... there will always be that void in your heart, where something once lived... I think there will always be a wound... a wound that never heals... life goes on... but when you stop and remember... you feel the pain of the wound... like it was just yesterday...

and at times... you just have to embrace the tears... and succumb to the sadness... because it's moments like these where you really feel how deep love is... and how love never stops... even after years have past... a person's love continues to permeate inside of you...

here are some pictures of my beautiful sister... Myra... 1978 - 1996...

"Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy..." -Eskimo Proverb



the four sisters... Myra's graduation dinner...


Myra & I... our trip to the Philippines in 96... it was awesome!


in Japan... on the trip home...


since I can't visit her grave in Michigan... Dave & I will be spending a quiet evening on the beach tonight... listening to the ocean... looking up at the stars... and simply remembering...